Today I will speak about judgement, advice and how it often takes the form of righteous judgement leading to giving others advice.
To the people giving out advice, be mindful of what you share. At this moment I’m trying to be in a neutral space of observation as I type now.
By no means is this written for one person, in fact, it applies to me as well at all times. To have people looking for direction in life, I try to stay impartial and speak from observation, not judgement.
Often advice seems like you’re helping others in your point of view but offering it to specific people, even if they aren’t reaching out for advice is something else.
Offering advice when others never asked, or even showed an inkling of stress should be a huge neon signpost. In this very situation, it isn’t them that has a problem, it’s actually YOU not accepting them. Think about this… Are you letting them be free, or are you wanting them to fit in the box that YOU want?
“Kindly let me help you or you will drown said the monkey, putting the fish safely up a tree.”
There are indeed individuals in this reality and it would seem this individual doesn’t fit into your “box” of expectations, or beliefs. To honour diversity and individuality in this world is the key to living peacefully.
Now the most important part is also knowing when to step away from people. Knowing the DUAL state of this world is very important. To know there are situations with contrasts involved, know that there is oneness but that they belong in a different ripple or wave in this ocean of life.
To know the contrast in this world is also to know some won’t vibe with you or could be potentially abrasive to your lifestyle. Please walk away, because many can’t change and could cause you great distress.
To know judgement vs observation is a powerful tool to navigate through life. It could help with not being fooled and being able to walk away mindfully.
Offering advice may seem like assisting in correcting someone’s path, but as someone suggested, “you cannot change people no matter how much you think they should change. People change themselves.”.
When simply observing actions by others, I realized it was the adviser that wasn’t satisfied, not the person they’re trying to give advice to.
Without complaint, you’re living life in a satisfied state, but I suppose the person giving advice must feel triggered by what they see and judge your life in comparison to how they are living.
We all lived a different life growing up and these experiences shaped our lives. Culture, gender, beliefs, experiences all had an effect just to mention a few. Our upbringing is so incredibly diverse, how could we judge how to live and act?
At this point, I only try to offer advice when someone asks, continually complains about their miserable life (not just minor gripes) or someone tries to push me to change. After a few suggestions for me to change, I will speak up about their “advice” and give them this point of view.
“Who isn’t satisfied? Is it really me or are you not accepting me as an individual?”
So after seeing how advice and judgement can affect a person’s growth and how it really isn’t my business to get involved, I will advise others only when I am prompted to do so and I’m going to ignore the rest. I have enough things to process in life to worry about others.
In the spiritual community, I’m known as a physical healer at best and not an emotional healer, a philosopher or a guru to give others advice. People’s lives are way too complex for me and I’m too lazy to get involved besides writing a post or two now and again.
Whether you’re a person giving advice or a person receiving constant advice from others, I hope something here in this post proves to be useful in some way.